Are you too an atheist Asked a colleague. Shocked & baffled with such a question.
It was as tough as an examiner asking," so, how would u rate your performance ?
"I have failed many such questions and now I precisely have failed even to attempt a judgement of self. Advocacy for a judgement largely depended on sequential arrangement of facts. So i decided to try placing the facts to find an answer.
In search of the genesis, i ask my mom, were i an easy temperament child? She answers, there is nothing easy in child rearing. An obvious answer from an unsophisticated feminist, who aren't rare in an non feudal villages.
Should i go about what i believe and what i not believe, what i have known and unknown?
What I Know not
What i know not, although i become joyous, rather thankful, is the answers when i being told as special by my longstanding long distance friend from BG, or when a text from Sabika comes in odd hours with odd spelling meaning to say she misses, when my friend calls me psycho to mean me as a patient & not therapist or when a friends calls me newly anna ( brother) despite my insistence that i am younger or equal (lying), or when my friend feeling weird, when people ask were u classmates?.
What i believe not
I dont believe it is out of my gregariousness, coz i know i am far from it. It is highly likely that there is no chance of even a hidden unexpressed gene for gregariousness in me, but probably a sociophobic gene.
What I know
I know , through all these decades, all that have been consistent are inconsistencies except my vulnerability The doubt when i attempt to talk, when i occupy space & time, if it were an infringement on a free human expression. Besides,I know that every smile is returned with a smile, be am a failure or non conformist or anything, a smile brings back a smile.
What i believe
I believe i am not a pilgrim on progress to celestial door but a wanderer who plays as though a prank, entering opened doors to greet asalamu alaikum ( peace be unto you) and runs back to security.
Am i an atheist?
"I have failed many such questions and now I precisely have failed even to attempt a judgement of self. Advocacy for a judgement largely depended on sequential arrangement of facts. So i decided to try placing the facts to find an answer.
In search of the genesis, i ask my mom, were i an easy temperament child? She answers, there is nothing easy in child rearing. An obvious answer from an unsophisticated feminist, who aren't rare in an non feudal villages.
Should i go about what i believe and what i not believe, what i have known and unknown?
What I Know not
What i know not, although i become joyous, rather thankful, is the answers when i being told as special by my longstanding long distance friend from BG, or when a text from Sabika comes in odd hours with odd spelling meaning to say she misses, when my friend calls me psycho to mean me as a patient & not therapist or when a friends calls me newly anna ( brother) despite my insistence that i am younger or equal (lying), or when my friend feeling weird, when people ask were u classmates?.
What i believe not
I dont believe it is out of my gregariousness, coz i know i am far from it. It is highly likely that there is no chance of even a hidden unexpressed gene for gregariousness in me, but probably a sociophobic gene.
What I know
I know , through all these decades, all that have been consistent are inconsistencies except my vulnerability The doubt when i attempt to talk, when i occupy space & time, if it were an infringement on a free human expression. Besides,I know that every smile is returned with a smile, be am a failure or non conformist or anything, a smile brings back a smile.
What i believe
I believe i am not a pilgrim on progress to celestial door but a wanderer who plays as though a prank, entering opened doors to greet asalamu alaikum ( peace be unto you) and runs back to security.
Am i an atheist?
